Blog — Happiness

How to Prevent Disappointment: 6 Strategies for Getting What You Need

I want it! I need it! I have to have it! If I don't, I'm gonna... If you want to prevent disappointment, add some give and flexibility in your expectations. This piece that I wrote for Huffington Post tells you how.

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What's Wrong With Positive Thinking? Simple Strategies To Manage Your Thoughts

glass-half-fullPositive Thinking could be considered the high fructose corn syrup of the thinking world -- when forced. It's not necessary, natural, and research has found that it's not good for us when we have to sell ourselves on it.

All of us feel upset from time to time, and can, depending on the day or our temperament, slip or sprint into a place of self-loathing, world-loathing, hell. When we are in that place we don't need to be airlifted to Disney, we just want to re-route our perfect nose-dive towards utter misery. Just about any other destination will do. In that state of despair, the last logical thing to do--even it were humanly possible--is to do a back-breaking reach for the positive. If our children did that kind of maneuver in the middle of a tantrum we'd take their temperature or call an exorcist. Why? Because in that moment, we are essentially lying to ourselves. There's no rationale for it. Fake stuff doesn't work: nutritionally or emotionally.

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8 Ways to Strive for Excellence Not Perfection and Live a Better Life!

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I was in my favorite coffee shop recently (I would walk very far for the best iced Americano in town) and the barista was dumping out a latte that just wasn't up to snuff for her. I joked that perfectionism is only important when it comes to making coffee. She laughed and said, no, perfectionism is important everywhere. We got into a whole discussion about whether perfectionism was really sustainable, how it is different from striving for excellence. In the end we agreed to disagree (I think it's just a matter of time, she's young) and I enjoyed my delicious drink. But it got me thinking about how destructive perfectionism can be to a person's well-being, not to mention productivity, so I am reposting this piece I wrote on the topic a bit ago. Here's to striving for excellence (not perfection)!

 

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