Posted on July 22, 2019
Do you have a student starting college in a few weeks? If you and your student are feeling anxious about this transition it's totally to be expected. How could it be otherwise? Our second child is leaving the nest and while I'm confident that she is ready, much to her chagrin-- I wrote this blogpost about continuing to hound, I mean teach about being responsible-- emotionally and practically. Because, let's face it, roommates and friends may not be charmed by things like: being late, not having your keys, leaving dirty dishes around, etc etc. At our house we even made a Bingo game for practicing new skills (because that's just the kind of people we are....). So, with our daughter's gracious permission, and it must be said, she is a wonderful human being...I'm sharing it here. In addition, here are lots of ideas for emotional and practical preparation for a great start to college. Maybe you'll make a bingo card too-- or at least talk about it. OK, yes, this might just cue the eye rolling, but parents-- we know what we're talking about even though our kids may never admit it. Right? Best wishes to all for a great start to college!
Read more »
Posted on July 11, 2019 in
What is the path to empathy? We have all been urged (or at times, chided) to "step into someone else's shoes," But just as we might strain to comprehend the extent of the physical pain someone is experiencing when they look so normal, so like us on the outside, we can strain to fathom the extent of emotional distress others endure in the absence--to us-- of a good enough cause. In other words, try as we might, someone else's shoes just might not fit. That's OK. We don't have to understand what someone else is feeling, we just have to want to. Instead of doing the far stretch into someone else's shoes, as fellow human beings we all understand suffering-- whether from anxiety, or loss, or pain, so we can step into our own shoes, flip through our own feelings of vulnerability and find a "good enough" empathic match. Here are some ideas to run with (in your empathy shoes!). Here's to less worry and more empathy all around.
Read more »
Posted on July 9, 2019 in
"Panic is hard to understand if you haven't experienced it," this is what a twelve year old girl recently told me through her tears, upset that her parents can't understand her and so can't help her feel better. Her parents (and the millions of other parents of kids with anxiety) are upset because they want to empathize and help, but don't know how. How can parents get up to speed so that kids aren't feeling lost and alone with frightening symptoms and experiences that they themselves can't understand? A new memoir called Little Panic by writer and mental health advocate Amanda Stern gives us some powerful answers. Little Panic illuminates with poignancy, clarity and wit, Stern's experience of and ultimate triumph over growing up with an undiagnosed panic disorder. Stern's spot on descriptions of the struggles of anxious kids have become my go to for parents who want to understand what anxiety feels like to a child, but importantly, Stern's story and her life will inspire adults struggling with anxiety to see that with knowledge and persistence you really can free yourself from anxiety and live the life you want. Please check out Little Panic!
Read more »